Britney Spears is getting rid of a few things. Her conservatorship isn’t one of them.

Despite speculation that the 28-year-old pop star was heading to court Friday to get the ball rolling on ending her father’s control over her financial and medical affairs, E! News has learned that such was not the case.

Instead, money—both to give and receive—was the order of the day.

At the request of Geraldine Wyle, attorney for the conservatorship, L.A. Superior Court Commissioner Reva Goetz agreed to seal today’s proceedings because of the “medical and personal information” being discussed.

Following afternoon recess, Goetz signed off on the conservators’ request regarding “the disposal of certain property” and their desire to auction off a dress Britney wore to the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards to benefit Haiti earthquake relief.

No one divulged what said property was, only that it included “items no longer useful to Spears.”

“She’s perfectly satisfied with the disposal of property,” the singer’s attorney, Samuel Ingham, said after court today. And “she was very enthusiastic” about the Haiti donation, he added.

Britney wasn’t around for the hearing postmortem, however.

The currently brunette “Circus” songstress, who showed up alongside dad Jamie wearing a black skirt and gray jacket, had to leave early because of a prior commitment with her kids.

She is “appreciative of the extra time and energy the court has given” to these proceedings, Ingham said.

“Brooke had to have emergency surgery to have her wisdom tooth extracted,” Mueller’s mother, Moira Fiore, exclusively tells E! News. “It became infected.  The infection spread and now she has pneumonia in both lungs.”

Mueller was admitted to the ICU at Sherman Oaks Hospital today with a 105-degree fever and, according to her attorney, she’s “not doing great.”

“Brooke is still in the hospital. She’s doing OK but she’s not doing great,” lawyer Yale Galanter tells E! News. “We thought there was a possibility she was going to be released today, but she’s not because she has developed pneumonia in her lungs.”

While a postponement is expected, a judge in Aspen, Colo., will officially rule tomorrow morning on whether to accept the motion to take the 32-year-old’s order of protection hearing against husband Charlie Sheen off the docket for the week, according to Galanter.

Read the motion.

“When her medical condition changed, it was my opinion there was no way she could be in Aspen for a Friday hearing, and the judge is not allowing her to appear by phone,” he said. “So, we filed a motion requesting the hearing date be pushed to Feb. 8.”

Mueller and Sheen were originally supposed to appear yesterday, but the hearing was bumped to Friday after Mueller became ill. A judge had ordered both spouses to be present.

Also today, Pitkin County District Court Judge James Boyd approved Galanter’s emergency motion to allow Sheen to visit his wife in the hospital, which he’s already done.

“The judge did sign an order allowing Charlie and Brooke to have contact,” Galanter said. “The order will read as long as Brooke is in the hospital, Charlie can see her.

Read the ruling.

“The judge wants to have a status conference on that issue tomorrow morning at 9 a.m., so nothing has been decided,” he continued. “The reports saying the hearing has been canceled are wrong. The judge has not made a decision on our request one way or another.”

Boyd denied Galanter’s request to allow an ailing Mueller to participate Wednesday via teleconference.

Reminder, just in case you thought it was 1995 because the headlines are about Charlie Sheen’s bad behavior, it’s actually 2010.

In fact, our first Week in Review of this fresh new decade is full of menchildren (mendren?), their naughty ways and the women who tolerate them before they empty out their side of the bedroom and secure legal counsel.

So, who caught Two and a Half Men in syndication the other night…?

1. Spotty Sheen: The Heidi Fleiss-era bad boy—more popular than ever now thanks to an overrated hit sitcom, Hollywood’s short memory and his twin sons—did his image no favors by getting arrested in Aspen on Christmas for allegedly assaulting and threatening to kill his wife of nine months, Brooke Mueller, while wielding a knife. Both supposedly want out of their marriage—despite all the love ‘n’ stuff—for various reasons. Sheen is one of the highest paid sitcom stars aroud. If you were in Muellers’ shoes, would your prenup suffice? Then again, she doesn’t exactly have a spotless record, either. Oh, if only walls, or Denise Richards, could talk…

2. The Odd Couple: Not one to slink down the totem pole of douches dudes behaving shadily, Jon Gosselin blamed Hailey Glassman for trashing his (or their?) NYC apartment. The apparently over-it 22-year-old says all she did was take the TV and a few other things that belonged to her on her way out and did not leave the place torn asunder. Even though Hailey claims Jon pushed her during a fight and Jon’s attorney has threatened Hailey with jail, the mature, rational adults are currently trying to work out their differences.

3. Fallout Boy: Tiger Woods lost another multimillion-dollar sponsorship, his third since he crashed his clown car and 12 alleged girlfriends rolled out. But look on the bright side, Tiger: AT&T isn’t the only carrier with good unlimited-texting plans. (And for the record: Unfortunately, it was indeed Tiger Woods in Florida that night. He wasn’t in Arizona like that hoax email suggested.)

3. Schadenfreude: Rush Limbaugh was hospitalized after having chest pains while on vacation in Hawaii. Some of you actually rejoiced. Funny world we live in.

4. Bridge to Nowhere: The Palins and Johnstons are at it again. This time Bristol and Levi are battling over custody of their son Tripp.
5. Winter TV Wonderland: Life will go on after the demise of The Tyra Show. Watch With Kristin is counting down the top 10 can’t-miss season premieres coming your way in the new year. First, tell us what returning series you’re most excited about—Lost, American Idol, Damages, Ice Road Truckers…Then vote for your fave fabulous female on the small screen. The competition is heating up, and only one woman will be on top when all is said and done.

6. Bada-$#&@!: Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi had a few choice words—none of them printable—for Dominos Pizza, which pulled its ads from MTV’s Jersey Shore because of…well…the content of Jersey Shore.

7. Fairytale Ending: Turns out Taylor Swift won’t be riding off into the sunset on the back of Taylor Lautner’s white horse. Jude Law and Sienna Miller, not to mention Leonardo DiCaprio and Bar Refaeli, may still have a chance, though.
8. Errata: New Moon was practically one big mistake. As was 17 Again, although you probably didn’t have to tell Matthew Perry that.

9. Malfeasance: The police chief involved in the break-in at SJP’s surrogate’s house got prison time…Mike Tyson was cleared in his November pap fracas…Roman Polanski is touched by all the support since his September arrest.

10. Odds ‘n’ Ends: Get to know Rosie O’Donnell’s new ladyfriend…Check out Kourtney Kardashian’s baby boy…Chris Robinson’s populating his new nest…Hélio Castroneves welcomed a daughter…Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart are having a girl…Van Morrison was hacked and therefore did not have a baby…Kudos to Ellen and Tim from PETA…Thriller was made even more historic…R.I.P., Jimmy Sullivan of Avenged Sevenfold…Brittany Murphy’s death certificate was released.

Prosecutors in Pitkin County, Colo., are looking to maintain an order of protection issued against Charlie Sheen in the wake of his Christmas Day bust-up with wife Brooke Mueller.

In court papers obtained by us, District Attorney Martin C. Beeson has filed a petition categorically opposing a request by Sheen’s counsel, Richard C. Cummins, to dismiss a permanent protection order barring the couple from having any contact—standard operating procedure in cases of suspected domestic abuse in order to safeguard the victim.

We guess that’s what the 44-year-old “Wild Thing” actor gets for being too wild (right, Denise?).

A spokesperson for Beeson was unavailable for comment.

However, deputy prosecutor Arnold Mordkin told ETOnline that despite Mueller’s request to have the order modified so she can discuss reconciling with her husband, it’s his office’s policy to keep in place prohibitions that bar Sheen from possessing a weapon, drinking alcohol and using drugs.

It seems prudent in light of the fact that apparently this isn’t the first violent confrontation between the pair.

Cops were called to the Sheens’ Aspen home on Dec. 25 after Mueller dialed 911 and reported that the twosome got into a violent quarrel that resulted in the Two and a Half Men star pulling a knife on her and threatening her life.

Sheen was arrested and booked on charges of domestic violence, including second-degree assault and menacing, and was released from the county jail after posting an $8,500 bond.

According to one online report, however, Mueller told officers at the scene in an affidavit that in the months preceding their holiday blowout, the duo got into a row that ended with Charlie knocking his real estate investor spouse to the ground where she hit her head, requiring her to seek medical attention. She did not report the incident, though.

Sheen’s next court date is set for Feb. 8. But lawyers for both him and Mueller are expected to meet at a hearing on Monday and ask a judge to alter the order so they can communicate directly.

Speaking of communicating, the Pitkin County Department of Social Services has reached out to the Los Angeles Department of Children and Family Services as part of a routine investigation into the welfare of the duo’s 9-month-old twin boys, Max and Bob.

Celebrity Sublebrity attorneys—they’re just like us! In that they want this whole Jon Gosselin-Hailey Glassman mess to end as much as we do.

Hailey’s attorney, Stephanie Ovadia, told E! News that the Gosselin-Glassman brain trust plan to meet up in an attempt to put this whole jail-threatening, apartment-ransacking, disappearing-complaint business behind both them and the pop culture-consuming public before the matter moves to court.

“We are going to sit down together and try and resolve all of the outstanding issues,” Ovadia said. “This way both of them can move on. They are both young adults”—if you call a 32-year-old father of eight a young adult, that is—”and let them move on with their lives…they both have their own responsibilities they need to get to.”

Ovadia said that no date has yet been set for the summit, but that once the meeting gets penciled in, the time will be announced. All the better to ensure their maximum press coverage privacy, presumably.

“Hopefully the two of them will come to some resolve where they can move on. I would love to see it happen and make 2010 a new, happy year for everybody!”

From her lips to Baby New Year’s ears.

Read the report

Sheen became enraged when Mueller told him she wanted a divorce and would take their children away, states the report filed by responding officer Rick Magnuson of the Aspen Police Department. (Mueller talked to a female officer at the scene, who relayed her statements to Magnuson.)

When Mueller said this, Sheen straddled her on the bed and grabbed the upper part of her throat, she told police, adding that he then put a knife to her throat and said, “You better be in fear. If you tell anybody, I’ll kill you.”

And his alleged comments get nastier.

“Your mother’s money means nothing, I have ex-police I can hire who know how to get the job done and they won’t leave any trace,” Sheen continued, according to Mueller.

Mueller told the police that she feared for her life and that Sheen only let her up when she apologized, telling him, “You’re right, you’re right, you’re right. I’m sorry, I love you.”

The 32-year-old mother of twins had red marks on her neck that Mueller said were caused when Sheen held her down, the report continues.

While the female cop was questioning Mueller, Magnuson was busy with Sheen, who is referred to throughout the report by his given name, Carlos Irwin Estevez.

Magnuson states that Mueller, who had called 911, was in the kitchen and Sheen was upstairs when he first arrived at their home.

Once he got ahold of Sheen, the actor told the cop that Mueller had been “abusing alcohol” and that the two had been having marital problems.

Sheen told Magnuson that Mueller was jealous of his relationship with a daughter he fathered with someone else and that their latest argument started when he “shared a song for his daughter.”

Their “predominantly verbal” scuffle escalated and both slapped each other’s arm during the fight, Sheen said. Mueller “irately” threatened to divorce him and take the kids, and at some point he grabbed her eyeglasses off her face and snapped them in two, the actor admitted.

Per the report, Sheen denies ever threatening his wife with a knife or strangling her.

Once he had seen the weapon, a folding knife with a 4-inch blade, and talked to Mueller, Magnuson put Sheen under arrest.

The Two and a Half Men star was booked on suspicion of menacing and second-degree assault, both felonies, as well as misdemeanor criminal mischief.

He posted $8,500 bail that night, and a routine order of protection was issued mandating that Sheen stay away from Mueller and not try to contact her.

Sheen is due in court Feb. 8 to face the rap if prosecutors opt to press charges.

The 44-year-old Two and a Half Men star was arrested yesterday morning in Aspen, Colo., and released that night after posting an $8,500 bond.

Aspen Police Department spokeswoman Stephanie Dasaro tells E! News the felony menacing charge Sheen is facing would not go into further detail—for the record, they aren’t naming the victim, either—other than to say the count does involve “a weapon of some sort.”

Aspen Chief Deputy D.A. Arnold Mordkin says he has spoken to Sheen since the incident. He “seemed upset, but was cooperative and pleasant,” he said.

While Sheen is not required to remain in Aspen at this time, he will need to return for his court appearance on February 8, when Mordkin plans to formally file charges.

And the plot thickens.

As we exclusively reported Saturday, a source close to Charlie Sheen’s Christmas day scuffle in Colorado revealed that a “weapon of some sort,” had been involved. Now the same source tells E! News the weapon present in Sheen’s domestic dispute, and the cause of his felony menacing charges, was a knife.

During the reported domestic dispute between Sheen and wife Brooke Mueller, the Two and a Half Men star allegedly threatened his better half with a knife in the living room of her Aspen rental home.

Aspen’s Chief Deputy District Attorney Arnold Mordkin tells E! News that he “cannot confirm nor deny” the presence of the knife, while Pitkin County Police Department spokeswoman Stephanie Dasaro would only say that additional information regarding the Sheen case will be made available on Monday.

Calls for comment from the actor’s rep have yet to be returned.

Shane Sparks, the award-winning hip-hop choreographer on Fox’s So You Think You Can Dance and a judge on MTV’s America’s Best Dance Crew, was arrested early Friday in Los Angeles and charged with eight counts of felony child molestation.

Los Angeles Police Department spokesman Bruce Borihanh tells E! News that the 40-year-old hoofer, whose legal name is Melvin Sparks, was taken into custody by detectives at about 8 a.m. at his North Hollywood home on a felony warrant.

“Sparks has been the subject of an ongoing child-molestation investigation,” Borihanh says. He was booked into Van Nuys jail and is being held in lieu of $590,000 bail.

The investigation centers on a decade-old incident involving a teenager.

Jane Robison, a spokeswoman for the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s Office, says a criminal complaint was filed by the alleged victim, whose full name they are withholding because she was a minor at the time.

“There’s one victim, and it occurred in the ’90s. I believe it started in ‘94 and went on for several years,” Robison tells E! News. “It’s an underage girl. She was under 15 when the alleged crimes occurred. She is an adult now and came forward to authorities.”

According to the official criminal complaint, the felony charges filed today against Sparks include six counts of committing a lewd act upon a child 14 years old or younger, and two counts of oral copulation of a person under 16 for acts committed between 1995 and 1997.

If convicted, Sparks would have to provide a DNA sample and fingerprints for a national database of sex offenders, pursuant to California Penal Code Section 290.

The dance instructor’s rep, Mona Loring, tells E! News, “As this is an active legal matter, we are refraining from comment at this time.”

Sparks shot to fame as a cochoreographer on the 2004 movie You Got Served before joining SYTYCD.

His work on the Fox reality hit garnered him an Emmy nomination for Outstanding Choreography, after which he was tapped to be a judge on MTV’s dance-themed competition, America’s Best Dance Crew, which just wrapped its fourth season.

Sparks is the second choreographer affiliated with SYTYCD to be arrested for sex crimes in recent months. Alex Da Silva, who specialized in the show’s salsa, mambo and Argentine tango routines, was arrested in August on charges that he raped four of his dance students.